My biggest dilemma

 Should I  do it? Should I do it now? Can I do it? Will that be the right thing to do?

I am talking about quitting the corporate job that I don't like. 

There are two types of questions that cloud my mind whenever I think about this. The first type of questions are like why should I be doing this at all. Actually I am looking for the best justification that will amply justify my actions, if I took that step. The second type of questions are like what I will be doing to make both ends meet if I took that step. These may be the questions on the surface and we will come back to these later, I, however, think that there are some more fundamental questions I am dealing with, such as:

1. How the life should be lived? What is important in life? It is understood that a comfortable life needs things that bring material comforts that money can buy. One should not starve and should not be dependent on anyone else for money. This is also understood that most of the material things and the things that are considered important by the society, such as success, name, fame, money, etc. can possibly be achieved provided one pursues them seriously, sincerely and honestly. But this requires one to give his time and attention and focus all his energies on the desired goals. Then the question becomes what is worth pursuing and how far one should go in one's pursuit. The problem with such pursuits is that this is endless as the more one puts the more one gets and the more one gets, the more he wants further. So, where should one stop? The bigger problem is that one realizes this only after he has come a long way. And in the process, many have lost more precious things such as health, relationship, peace of mind, etc. This realization happens only after one has lost them, not until then, unless one is intelligent enough to observe the fate of others in the world.

At the same time, this can also be very easily understood that performing some actions is a must. No body can sit idle doing nothing. Thus the question that gains importance is this - how should one spend time in his life i.e. doing what or what kind of actions or profession should be chosen and what should his goals be?

2. Do I have the right to choose my profession? This question can further be compounded if I add which stage of my life I am contemplating on this, especially if this mid-way and when I have a family to provide for? Bhagwad Gita suggests that one has no right on the fruits of one's action. It also suggests that the right actions for one are those actions that are in accordance with one's nature (dharma). Why does it say that? It also says that one should perform actions considering that one is neither the doer nor the enjoyer. So the key question is what is right action (duty, profession) for me, irrespective of my past?

3. Is staying happy so important that even changing my profession would be justified, if that helps me find my happiness? Can true happiness be dependent on any thing or is it just an illusion that my current profession is the cause of my unhappiness and getting away from it will help me find my happiness? Or is this just only a problem with my attitude? Does being happy need only a shift in mind or attitude and once that is done, one can stay happy no matter what the circumstances are?

4. Is doing what you like the right principle to use in selecting my profession? Or, should I evolve mentally so much that I become indifferent to my likes and dislikes and how I feel in one profession? Even if that may sound as the right philosophy, it is so difficult to get in that state of mind and stay in that all the time.

5. Do I know what is the right action for me? Or, even forget the right action, do I even know what I want to do or doing what keeps me happy? Is there a specific domain or subject matter where not only I have deep interest or passion, I also have great competency or skills. Such things generally make one happy and the results of his actions are far superior, well appreciated by others and can truly serve some real needs of the world.

6. Assuming I am able to figure the above out, is it the time to make the switch? Can I take the risks? Do I have trust on my own capabilities and faith in the greater power? Is the pain that I experience in my job far greater than the perceived risk? Or, are my expectations from the corporate inflated that I assumed that it could give me a job that I may like and that can keep me happy? May be this is the way it is for majority of us and people just pretend to be happy. On the other hand, there may be a handful of people who may have developed such a strong mind that it really does not matter to them and they perform their actions without being affected by them. I still feel that it is the right mental attitude to have but it is not easy.